Accepting Reality

I have written two books recently (Fearless Writing and Everyone Has What It Takes) both of which are essentially about what you should not think if you want write and create successfully. I learned that there are certain thoughts, like, “I wonder what other people will think of my story?” and, “Some people have what it takes and some people do not,” that are incompatible with writing. It doesn’t matter how skilled I am as a writer or how passionate I am about my subject matter, these thoughts, and others like them, will bring creativity to a stop. Each in their own way asks questions I cannot answer, and as long as I ask them, I will be paralyzed with uncertainty.

I have to come to understand the same is true of pessimism – though it is incompatible not just with creativity but with happiness. And by happiness I mean life, really, though you can certainly live unhappily, as anyone who has ever drawn a breath knows well. It’s just that no one actually wants to live unhappily, no matter how often we do.

I do not know how to be happy and pessimistic. I have certainly tried. I called it being “realistic.” It didn’t matter what I called it, thinking pessimistically did not bring me any joy. Nor did it protect me from misfortune – nor disappointment, which was perhaps it’s primary intention. Believe in the worst and you won’t mind when it arrives. In truth, you will mind, but you will have the brief and shallow satisfaction of having been right.

Pessimism, of course, is entirely about the future. It is never about the present, as in the actual present, where I am at this very instant. I can’t be pessimistic about the present; I already know what it is. I can either accept what is or reject it, resist it, and complain about it. Accepting what is works best, as it’s the only way to work with reality rather than against it. What’s more, if I learn how to work with reality, with what is, I don’t need to predict the future. I will have to do with the future exactly what I’m doing with the present, which is accept, accept, accept – the very thing we writers crave for all the stories we wish to share.

If you like the ideas and perspectives expressed here, feel free to contact me about individual coaching and group workshops.

Everyone Has What It Takes: A Writer’s Guide to the End of Self-Doubt
You can find William at: williamkenower.com