Correct Intention
I had just heard from an editor who had accepted my pitch for her foodie magazine. This would be a personal essay for which I would be paid a nice chunk of money, more than I had been paid for anything else until that point. I really wanted to publish this piece. I had met this editor, and I knew she liked my writing. But I also knew myself. Because she hadn’t technically accepted the piece yet, I knew I would be inclined in subtle ways to write with her acceptance in mind, to ask myself as I wrote, “Is this what she wants?”
As much as I wanted to see this essay published in her magazine, I didn’t want to write this way anymore. I felt as if I’d spent years doing just that, and I believed I’d gone a long way to cure myself of that habit by writing a blog five-days-a-week for this online publication. The blogs had no gatekeeper but myself. There was no one I was trying to please and satisfy but myself. Not only did I produce the best writing of my life, I always felt my best while I did it – felt the calmest, the most confident, the most like myself.
So, as I sat down at my desk to start the essay, I set an intention. I wanted to feel as if I was writing one of my blogs. If I felt any different than that, if I felt I was pushing, forcing, or worrying, I would stop writing immediately. I told myself it didn’t matter how long it took to write it, that it didn’t matter if I never finished it, I would not write it to try to please her.
As it happens, I wrote the essay in one shot and she accepted it. I was glad for that, and the money was nice, and it was fun to see it when I received my complimentary copy, but what pleased me most was how I wrote it. That, to me, was instant success, and it was a consequence of my intention. It’s so easy when we write to give ourselves the wrong intention, to focus on acceptance and money and seeing our stuff in print. All of that is merely the consequence of the correct intention, one I must set for myself each time I sit down to write.
If you like the ideas and perspectives expressed here, feel free to contact me about individual coaching and group workshops.
Everyone Has What It Takes: A Writer’s Guide to the End of Self-Doubt
You can find William at: williamkenower.com